The Eureka Moment

      As in life, so also in my creative endeavors, it's been a lifelong pattern to please everyone else first. Believe me when I say, I'm am no martyr to motherhood, I am not Martha Stewart and I stop and smell every excuse for a rose. The point is, as mama to a small herd and missus to a community involved man, I've become accustomed to filling the bill. Perhaps it would carry little joy for some but, surprisingly, it has always been purposeful and pleasurable to be  fulfilling expectations and needs of the gang, their team mates, their classmates, their teachers, colleagues, parishioners, ( best friend's boyfriend's mother's hairdresser, twice removed? )

      The creative process needs freedom to flow and rise out of the mist of imagination. Yes, I know that sounds fluffy and ethereal. More concretely put, the same old same old is not what grabs you at the gallery. The eye and the heart are drawn to something new or striking or emotive.

       Another mistake I've made is to put perception and price in my thought process. I need to learn to please myself, I need to fling paint and not care what it costs, splash willy-nilly on big pieces of paper and if it's a flop put it in the blender for papier mache.

      It's funny, I criticise 80% of what I paint and curse the other 20 but the proverbial eye of many beholders accept, admire and applaud. In saying that, you can already see I'll need help climbing out of the rut that places "self worth" outside of self. When folks generously offer the advice "Suit yourself," they don't realize i need the "Living for Yourself Guide for Dummies" that goes with it.

Putting my foot in it..

      Recently, I've been striving to go against the grain..
      My husband has been, for 38 years, a conscientious, well respected and beloved rural educator. Meanwhile, I have always been the bumbling, disorganised stay-at-home-momma-with-some-skills. With full knowledge of my innate tendency to procrastinate and in the grip of a terror that will wreak intestinal havoc on my being, I have committed to a creative workshop. ( with a venue and a schedule and everything! )
      Through the decades of raising my children oftentimes I found myself breaking out the supplies and having them beside me mucking about. ( "Mommy, can we play too??" ) As well, my hubby couldn't draw a stickman without help so, when one of the many "hats" a teacher is required to wear was an artists, I filled in to "play" with his class. Staff and students alike called on me over the years. So many things  tumbled out of our collective imaginations. How-tos in various media, themed projects to enhance curriculum, sets and props for plays. ( remembering those will be a blog for another day..)
       One of the media we enjoyed was papier mache, not just volcanoes and hallowe'en masks but full-on  "Ask-her,-she-can-make-anything" endless creations. Possibilities in paper, that's what I'm offering to teach in May.
      Two days to learn how recycle any inmaginable scrap paper to make awesome new textured sheet papers that can be used for scrap booking, card making or crafted into jewellery, trinket and gift boxes. Then another two day class will follow to work and sculpt in papier mache using strip and "mash" techniques. 
      In keeping with the push for green living, It is a means of recycling  trash to treasure, cost effective and filled with limitless possibility. Come, "play" with me!! ( and imagine lots of pictures here, someone PLEASE tell me how to post pictures.) 

Hello,..is anybody in there...

I've been led astray yet again, manacled to this screen instead of my easel and brushes! A wise person said the only thing standing between me and fulfilment is me. Me and the lure of cyberspace. 
      In simpler times, family was always near and when they weren't, there was an old family album or ornately framed pictures on a lace-doilied mantel. In the new millennium my whole gang is on Facebook, Twitter and recently, here on Blogger.com!  Now, I've followed them into the vortex and today, my first blog. 
      The fact is, I am very fulfilled by the love and rewards that have been given to me by four amazing offspring, each a truly original work of art. The problem I have is shifting my focus now that they're grown. For so long, my waking thoughts have were a litany of wants and needs and "Mom-where-is-mys" I need to defrag my tired floppy discs and allow myself to wake up to a new day, a truly blank canvas, and focus on creating a new masterpiece for myself and maybe I'll need to shut off the computer, once in awhile!